Survivor: Worlds Apart

originally aired February 25, 2015 to May 20, 2015

The order in which players left the game and the impact they left behind:

• So (White Collar) Why Carolyn did not win is because of moves like siding with someone like Shirin rather than So or Joaquin, who were the first players to actually consider strategy this season.
• Vince (No Collar) Next time, ah, try and spend a little less time on jealous obsession (concerning Joe) and a little more on the, oh, game...
• Nina (No Collar) Right, the deaf one.  Who unfortunately made it an issue perhaps a little bigger than it needed to be.  Although weirdly, her No Collar tribemates weren't particularly cool about it, either.
• Lindsey (Blue Collar) The one time Rodney was effective all season was in getting her eliminated.
• Max (White Collar) The only White Collar nearly as weird as Shirin, and the other one who walked around naked.  Also, hipster beard included.  Thankfully was not given a second chance by fans for the thirty-first season.
• Joaquin (White Collar) As indicated above, Joaquin was an early favorite of mine because he was, y'know, playing the game.  
• Kelly (Blue Collar) Survived getting busted open in the blindfold challenge.  This surprisingly won her very few points.  It's always odd when the players take the blindfold challenges in stride, because as a viewer it always seems like such an important moment in the game.  Either way, on that score alone I'd love to see what else she could accomplish.
• Hali (No Collar) Most of the season I identified Hali and Jenn as the No Collar ditzes.  Eventually, Jenn redeemed herself.  Hali?  Not so much.
• Joe (No Collar) More often than you'd think but less often than you'd wish, Survivor casts someone who seems totally at home playing the game, not so much strategy-wise but people who just get how to exist within it.  It figures that at least one of them is clearly identified as a No Collar.
• Jenn (No Collar) Until the final tribal council and she went the full Spencer, explaining to the jury (it's surprising how seldom this occurs) why Mike should be declared the winner, I didn't think much of her.  But she totally got it.  Finally.  If there's such a thing as someone you want on a jury, she's it.  
• Shirin (White Collar) Until she popped up in the Second Chance vote and I found out how much sympathy she garnered from fans, I honestly had no clue.  She looked like a lunatic throughout the game.  I'm sorry she had a rough early life, but I'm equally sorry that she's never moved past it, no matter what kind of success she's had in life.  In her mind, she's very much the victim she used to be.  This is true of many people.  But hopefully most of them would not confuse their past with something someone says to them in a game, based solely on experiences within the game, and mount a crusade that's every bit as silly as how Rodney behaved.  I mean, people weren't throwing themselves all over Brandon his second time around, when it was clear that the sins of Hanz before him had drastically affected his thought process.  It's no different, and as silly to me as heaping praise on Cirie for "getting off the couch."  I understand it's important to champion people and send messages, but...c'mon.  If you must exaggerate, at least be honest.  I'm not at all saying Shirin and her mother asked for whatever it was that happened to them, but at a certain point, and because of all the success she's had in business, you'd think she'd stop considering herself only a victim.  But all the behavior she exhibited this season...It paints a very unstable portrait.  At best, I'd say Survivor did a poor psych test.  Wouldn't be the first time.  It didn't make for good viewing, and as far as I'm concerned, she made a poor argument, and never looked good the whole season, for any number of reasons.  So no, I'm not happy she's returning, and I fully expect she'll be voted out early next season.  I'm sorry for what happened to her.  But she needs to make peace with herself.  Not with Will.  With herself.  That much is hugely obvious.
• Tyler (White Collar) Started playing hard, but way too late in the game.  If he ever plays again, I would expect a much better result.
• Dan (Blue Collar) Dan, Dan the Lunatic Man...If he could just get out of his own way, he could easily have this game thoroughly in hand.  Tried to play the Kim (One World) plan of ousting his main ally (Mike) and still coasting to victory.  Found out lightning rarely strikes twice.
• Sierra (Blue Collar) I liked her (I mean, she's one of the better-looking players all-time), but wanted to see some more actual gameplay.  At times it looked like she would oblige.  Then again, she was the only one to vote for Carolyn in the finals.  So I don't know.
• Rodney (Blue Collar) Boston Rob this guy was not.  Not quite the full Jamie (Guatemala), but somewhat very close.  Like Dan, but more so, got in his own way.  And could not figure out how to get out.
• Will (No Collar) I don't know how he made it to the finals except by way of attrition, his one notable moment was rather one of infamy, picking on the surprisingly fragile Shirin...
• Carolyn (White Collar) If this is how she behaves in the business world, I don't know...And to think it looked like she was this close to convincing the jury she deserved the win...Someone who very much needed a good player to make it all the way, because otherwise she was all over the place.  At times looked like she knew what she was doing, and actually somewhat decent in comparison to others...But honestly, Survivor stacks the deck with bad players every season.  She nearly cost a good player a much-deserved win because, well, she is definitely White Collar...
• Mike (Blue Collar) Another well-deserved winner!  I love it when this happens (far too infrequently, alas), and I'm happy to say I nailed it early, the second time in thirty seasons to do so (the last time...Richard Hatch!).  Like Tom in Palau, had to sweat the final few weeks, but this guy showed everyone up, he really did, and it made a lot of people resentful, until someone (Jenn) pointed out that he did exactly what you're supposed to do in this game, which is to play to win.  Mike was a master of tribal council, which is a true art form, and for a season like this, the part of the episode packed with the best moments.  And he accomplished all of that without a single stable alliance (thanks for everything, Dan and Carolyn!), which is even more striking. 

Season 31 - Second Chance voting recommendations

Last night during the latest episode of Survivor: Worlds Apart (which took a dramatic turn toward highly interesting a few weeks back thanks to everyone finally starting to play, and play hard, including poor Tyler, who barely existed previously back who now looks like he should be brought back at some point), here came Jeff Probst with an exciting announcement about the next season:

Returning players, but with an awesome new twist.  From a selection of people who agreed to return, fans get to vote on who will actually make an all-important second shot at winning Survivor.  None of these players have returned before, and there are a handful of wonderful surprises (much like Gervase finally showing up again for Blood vs. Water).

So out of all the options (I won't bore you with a complete rundown, because honestly some of the options I still don't care that much about just like I didn't think they were all that significant the first time they played), I will give you my picks and explain why:

Women

1. Kelly Wigglesworth (Season 1, Borneo) Honestly, she's a legend, as much as anyone else from the first season.  It's great to see her interested again.  Will she still be a rat???  Stay tuned!
2. Kimmi Kappenberg (Season 2, Australian Outback) Kimmi is more infamous than famous (my sister and I love "I can eat a worm! I can eat a worm!"), but probably one of the most famous players to have attempted a dramatic overhaul of their gameplay while playing their first time around.  Give her another chance?  Absolutely.  And you're guaranteed to be amused.
3. Peih-Gee Law (Season 15, China) I honestly don't remember how good she was, but I do remember her.  That's a good thing, right?
4. Mikayla Wingle (Season 23, South Pacific) Unfortunately, Brandon Hantz have something in common: we both think she's hot.  (Although this is probably something many people share with him, and hopefully one of the few).  And she absolutely got a raw deal because of Brandon's fixation.  So let's see if she can actually play!
5. Abi-Maria Gomes (Season 25, Philippines) One of the greatest villains in Survivor history?  Heck ya!
6. Monica Padilla (Season 19, Samoa) You'll notice the chronological break.  I had a hard time reaching ten for the women.  Monica describes herself as having figured out Russell before anyone else.  Didn't help her, but that's certainly a mark in her favor.
7. Natalie Tenerelli (Season 22, Redemption Island)
8. Stephanie Valencia (Season 22, Redemption Island) Both are veterans of the Season Boston Rob Finally Won, and so they have every right to prove they do deserve to be remembered for something other than helping him win (everyone did that season).
9. Tasha Fox (Season 28, Cagayan)
10. Kass McQuillen (Season 28, Cagayan) Both from the Brains/Beauty/Brawn experiment that helped make Tony look so good.  I'm including Tasha for that reason alone, even though my memory of her had faded after just a few seasons.  But "Chaos Kass," even though she was, in fact, a lunatic, should be brought back just to see if she goes the full lunatic again...

Men

1. Jeff Varner (Season 2, Australian Outback) I've been expecting to see him return for years.  Hopefully this is a slam dunk for any true fan of the game.
2. Andrew Savage (Season 7, Pearl Islands) See above.  Rupert ended up stealing Andrew's thunder (along with almost everything else).  Now's his chance for redemption.  Bring the sport coat!
3. Shane Powers (Season 12, Panama) Lunatic genius in the best possible sense.  
4. Terry Dietz (Season 12, Panama) My sister and I thought he could have been the second coming of Palau's Tom.  Who, y'know, decisively won that season.
5. Troyzan Robertson (Season 24, One World) Was on his way to making a terrific case for winning when Kim decided she could go to the end without him.  Her brilliant move, his easy case for a second chance.
6. Vytas Baskauskas (Season 27, Blood vs. Water) Proved Aras was not the only Survivor genius in the family.
7. Woo Hwang (Season 28, Cagayan)
8. Spencer Bledsoe (Season 28, Cagayan) If Tony hadn't been Tony, either of these guys would have been more than acceptable as winners that season.
9. Joe Anglim (Season 30, Worlds Apart)
10. Mike Holloway (Season 30, Worlds Apart) Both were and/or have been favorites of mine to win the current season.  Mike still might, but if he doesn't, he certainly has another get-out-of-jail card to stay in the game of Survivor.

Survivor: Worlds Apart...and my crazy early prediction

The thirtieth and latest season just premiered last Wednesday, so it's kind of ridiculous, sans any spoilers, to be placing bets on a winner.

But my choice as of right now is Mike.  His scorpion moment should already be considered an all-time classic.  Where else can you go from there?  All the way to victory!

Survivor: San Juan del Sur

originally aired September 24, 2014 to December 17, 2014

The order in which players left the game and the impact they left behind:

• Nadiya (Natalie/Coyopa) This former Amazing Race contestant, along with her twin sister, made no impact at all, except in the fruitful void she left in Natalie's game.
• Val (Jeremy/Coyopa) Much like Gervase's niece in the original Blood vs. Water season, seemed to have affected her loved one in departure not at all, even though John Rocker tried to express to Jeremy his attempt to save her.
• John Rocker (Julie/Coyopa) It will probably puzzle me indefinitely as to why he was even cast.  Except for direct provocation from Natalie, which gave Jeremy all the ammunition he needed to vote her as winner of the season, John was on good behavior for a baseball veteran known for the opposite.  I think the producers just wanted a little controversy, which wasn't really fair to John.  He was actually a pretty good player, and might have done much better if he hadn't had stigma attached to his name.
• Drew (Alec/Hunahpu) A hilarious example of the kind of strategizing that went on basically throughout the whole season except for a couple of players that should have between them produced the winner (more on that later).  
• Kelley (Dale/Hunahpu) I have no real impression of her.
• Dale (Kelley/Coyopa) I remember having an impression of him, but he lost the Interesting Old Man title to Keith the longer Keith stuck around.
• Julie (John Rocker/Hunahpu) The most unfortunate player of the season, and the real victim of casting John Rocker.  Of course she ended up quitting.  Although if she hadn't, she would certainly have had a good story to tell the jury.
• Josh (Reed/Coyopa) One of two players who were really playing, but didn't have a significant alliance with which to actually go anywhere.
• Jeremy (Val/Hunahpu) I think he let himself get in his own way, but otherwise another clear player this season.  He and Josh could probably do better given another shot.
• Wes (Keith/Coyopa) Other than being Keith's son, was a completely nonentity, aside from being one of the rude young boys.
• Reed (Josh/Hunahpu) Completely nailed Missy's true character twice, including in the finale, which surely ranks with Sue's famous "snake and rats" speech as one of the finest ever.  Might have gone further, once he proved he might actually have been better than Josh, if he were better at forming alliances.  Which basically makes him the same as Josh, actually.
• Alec (Drew/Coyopa) Proved to be less crazy than his brother, but not distinctive enough in "finally beating his brother at something" to compete with Natalie's constant sob story.
• Jon (Jaclyn/Hunahpu) He and Jaclyn dominated the season.  But like everyone else couldn't form a decent alliance to make it all the way.
• Baylor (Missy/Coyopa) Of the mother/daughter team, actually did more to deserve making it to the finals, but she ultimately doomed herself by depending too much on her mother (and vice versa).
• Keith (Wes/Hunahpu) Other than being inexplicably good at challenges, clearly had no real mind for the game.  Indicative of the general act of attrition that characterized most of the season.
• Missy (Baylor/Hunahpu) Hey, Missy: after the first two or three, you might begin to assume it's something you're doing wrong.  You're not the victim.  Stop thinking of yourself that way.  And you should definitely have been pulled after the injury.  Reed was right about your gameplay.
• Jaclyn (Jon/Coyopa) Deserved to win.  She's what Julie should have been, and exactly what Amber was in All Stars (or possibly only what Amber seemed to be because that jury wouldn't vote for Boston Rob), the other half of a real power couple, the epitome of what the season set out to discover, if existing relationships can excel in this game.
• Natalie (Nadiya/Hunahpu) Not one of the least deserving winners ever, but pretty close.  She won because Jeremy liked how she handled John Rocker, and was bitter about how Jon and Jaclyn voted him out.  Four other jurors ended up agreeing with him, basically just because.  Most certainly not the best player, just someone who outlasted her sister (as we heard often enough so that it lost its flavor) and a lot of other people.  Her biggest move saved Jaclyn.  That should have helped lead to a different result.  

Survivor: Cagayan

originally aired 2/26/14-5/21/14

The order in which players left the game and the impact they left behind:

• David ("Brains"/Luzon) The first and truest victim of the "Brains" tribe was arguably its smartest member...and so his elimination was telling for the whole season.
• Garrett ("Brains"/Luzon) The first victim of the real "Brains" implosion.
• Brice (Beauty/Solana) I don't really remember him at this point.
• J'Tia ("Brains"/Luzon) A crazy person who perfectly represented the bulk of the "Brains" tribe's legacy.
• Cliff Robinson (Brawn/Aparri) Acquitted himself better than Jeff Kent.  In an ultra-competitive season, that was not good enough.
• Lindsey (Brawn/Aparri) The main reason why I stopped liking Trish, because I sided with Lindsey in that feud.  Huge props to Lindsey for taking herself out of the game.  Hopefully gets another chance to play.
• Alexis (Beauty/Solana) The babe this season.  (Looks a lot like Amy Acker.)  Not the whole reason I was sad to see her go.  A victim of the ultra-competitiveness of this season, a better player than she might have seemed.  Sad to see her leave in tears.
• Sarah (Brawn/Aparri) An early favorite of mine, and an early signal that Tony was going to go far by the way he handled her.
• Morgan (Beauty/Solana) Lasted longer than anyone would've expected.  I think with a little more seasoning she might be more competitive.
• LJ (Beauty/Solana) One of the more anonymous members of the Beauty block.  Blandly competitive.
• Jeremiah (Beauty/Solana) One of the more competitive members of the Beauty block.
• Jefra (Beauty/Solan) Waited a little too long to become relevant.
• Tasha ("Brains"/Luzon) One of the few actual Brains in the "Brains" tribe.
• Trish (Brawn/Aparri) Didn't have a lot of respect for her.  A standout in the jury final voting session, but for the same reasons she was a standout elsewhere.  Not exactly in a good way.
• Spencer ("Brains"/Luzon) As close to a new Cochran as we're ever likely to get (early in the season he seemed more like an improved Todd, so his game play actually improved in my eyes).  Hopefully and likely will receive future shots at winning.  Also the best jury member ever.
• Kass ("Brains"/Luzon) The embodiment of everything that was wrong with the "Brains" tribe.  I developed an entirely new perspective on intelligence thanks to her, actually!  Measured intelligence is not the same as intelligence in execution, basically.  Because this was one stupid decision after another.  The new Lil.  The same fate.  The same delusional misunderstanding of herself.  I hope watching this season back makes her reevaluate a few things about herself.  That would be a huge step forward in her ability to actually earn a spot in a tribe made up of people known for their brains.  Because she just didn't show anything worthy of that.  All season long.  One blunder after another.  She did keep trying.  But in this instance, memorable for all the wrong reasons.
• Woo (Brawn/Aparri) The one smart thing Kass did was equate Woo with Fabio.  Because that's probably as accurate as you can get with this guy.  Likable in an easy, low-key kind of way.  The other, better way to describe him would be an improved version of Ian, the one who did the right thing in the best possible circumstances, chose honor over opportunity.  Cost him the win, obviously, but there are few runners-up worthy of more respect than Woo.  Hopefully gets another shot.
• Tony (Brawn/Aparri) Obviously had the time of his life playing (until he had to sit in front of the jury), one of the best competitors to ever play the game.  The good version of Russell, and was rewarded for it, with an assist from game jurist Spencer, who made an unprecedented appeal to his colleagues at the end of the Q&A session to look at the facts rather than instead of reflecting on their emotions.  There are so many past competitors who could've benefited from that (Amanda, in two separate seasons, comes to mind).  (Russell still deserved to lose.)  I was rooting for him virtually the whole season, until he started pulling a Kim.  But by the end, he even had me reevaluating Kim, who looks like a more and more deserving and smart winner, too.  (Although I'd been rooting for her from an early point, too.)  Ranks instantly as not only one of the best players but best winners, too.

Survivor: Blood vs. Water

originally aired 9/18/13-12/15/13

The order in which players left the game, and the impact they left behind:

• Rupert (Galang; Pearl Islands, All-Stars, Heroes vs. Villains) Played with his heart this time.  Very plainly sacrificed himself as the first victim of the season's theme.
• Colton (Galang; One World) Quitter (x2).  Should not be allowed to play again, no matter what he said at the reunion.  He's really good at making himself sound better there.
• Rachel (Tadhana; Tyson) By his own admission, a huge part of why Tyson eventually won.
• Marissa (Tadhana; Gervase) Probably the most tenuous and superfluous loved one of the season, and her fate played out accordingly.
• Candice (Galang; Cook Islands, Heroes vs. Villains) Got sent immediately to Redemption Island Arena, and just never made it out.
• Brad Culpepper (Tadhana; Monica) A classic case of strategizing himself right out of the game, although to his credit was the first one to do so this season.  Monica was competing against him all season, too, at least in her own mind.
• Kat (Galang; One World) Not as memorable this season as her first one, probably thrown off by the loved ones gimmick.
• John (Tadhana; Candice) Got tangled up in the loved ones affair and never really recovered.
• Laura B. (Tadhana; Rupert) On the plus side, probably did about as well as Rupert ever managed on his own, making this a Boneham tradition of coming up well short of the prize, although they both remain one of the classic pieces of Survivor history.
• Aras (Galang; Panama) Needed to be eliminated so that other people (read: Gervase and Tyson) could make it further, although his basic gameplay ability was definitely validated just in case anyone is still doubting that he deserved his Panama victory.
• Vytas (Tadhana; Aras) Proved he was every bit the match for his brother's gameplay.  In any other season probably a viable contender for the title of sole survivor.
• Caleb (Tadhana; Colton) Still trying to figure out what he sees in Colton (the reverse is obvious enough), but made a surprisingly competent contender although one without a real chance of winning.
• Katie (Tadhana; Tina) One of the real surprises, and one of the better strategists in the game, the last best victim of the loved ones affair.
• Hayden (Tadhana; Kat) Learned that there is a big difference between Survivor and Big Brother.
• Laura M. (Galang; Samoa) The subject of the season's biggest strategic move, although I'm not sure if it made a real difference other than in that family.
• Ciera (Tadhana; Laura M.) The loved one with the most gumption, although not the best strategist; even voting out her own mother didn't amount to everything she thought it would.
• Tina (Galang; The Australian Outback, All-Stars) Perhaps the biggest surprise of the season was a former winner who actually played better this time than when she won, a much bigger threat somehow and therefore a target to be eliminated.
• Gervase (Galang; Borneo) Moreso than Tina, a hugely remarkable turnaround from his earlier gameplay, although to be far he was one of the last two Tagi that first season so perhaps there was always indication that he could do well given another chance.  And so he did.  Not the most impressive in the challenges, but he did what was necessary at camp strategically to secure himself a worthy place in the finals and a good argument for winning if his ally Tyson hadn't done it better.
• Monica (Galang; One World) The classic case of an emotional argument speaking against its own chance of success, no matter how good it can sound, the feel-good argument of playing to believe in herself, creating her own legacy.  She achieved that her first season, and making it to the finals without really having done anything herself to get there (and deep down she knows that; she was the third man, and in the three-way final tribal, no matter how the votes actually shook out, that one never wins) was its own statement as well.  But she never had a chance to win, to be clear.
• Tyson (Galang; Tocantins, Heroes vs. Villains) A player who greatly benefited from a second and especially third chance, always memorable but never a clear threat to win until this season, and he did everything he needed to in order to do it, including clever usage of the hidden immunity idol.  Very happy with this result, a total deserving winner.  In a season heavily dominated by strategists rather than any one truly strong player, he still stood out.  Surprising for a season with a gimmick geared toward emotion, but it was Tyson who managed to strike the right balance, and so here he is.

Survivor: Blood vs. Water so far

We're now nine weeks into the twenty-sixth season of Survivor, and I figured I'd chime in on how it's been going.  In case you don't know, this is an entire "loved ones" season, in that half the cast is returning players and half various versions of their family.  The most obvious example of this is Rupert and his wife Laura.  Rupert became a fan favorite in his previous seasons in part because of the relationship he has with his wife, which was infectious the moment she visited him for the first time.  Of course, both of them quickly left this season.

Anyway, here's what I'm going to do, which is share text messages I've exchanged with my sister, who is also a big fan of the series, during the course of the season.  Let's begin:

9/18

Me: We're going to be watching Survivor.
Her: Of course you are.
Me: I was evoking [singing Wanda from] Palau.  You should sing that text to yourself.
Her: Lol
Me: [referencing a comment from the show for emphasis] Aras = likable winner.
Her: Gervase is still funny.
Me: Still awesome.
Her: No cow comments please [referencing infamous Gervase/Joel incident from Borneo].
Me: Mooo.
Her: Lol
Me: Bye Rupert's wife [referencing Laura being sent immediately to Redemption Island].
Me: Redemption Island is back!
Her: I already knew that [she favors spoilers].
Me: Rupert is good [referencing his decision to opt for the swap with his wife so he goes to RI instead of her].
Me: You're a spoily spoiler.
Her: Go Candice! Rupert's had a lot of chances already.  [Candice is the other player sent immediately to RI.]
Me: And gotten a million already [via audience fan favorite award].
Her: I don't understand why the vets didn't go after Tina or Rupert...
Me: Of course, Candice has played a few times too, and the reason Rupert exited Heroes vs. Villains.
Me: Besides Rupert himself.
Me: They went after an actual threat [in the decision to send Candice to RI; later developments prove Tina to be a major threat, however].
Her: She could have really helped them in challenges.
Me: Well, that's not how they think.
Me: It's on like hot buttered popcorn at the break of dawn!  [Referencing a favorite Gervase quote from Borneo.]
Her: Oye
Me: Oye!
Her: Maybe he took too many hits in the NFL...[referencing Brad Culpepper, Monica's husband and loved one]
Me: Probably.
Her: Not good game play.
Me: Professional athletes don't do well in this game.
Her: Not true, Gary did well [referencing Gary Hogeboom from Guatamala].
Me: They have to be high school coaches [referencing, of course, "Coach" Ben Wade].
Me: Gary?  He was just a regular guy!
Her: I'm going to hunt you down!  [Referencing a favorite quote from Amy that season.]
Me: Easy to hunt down!  [Not really, because Amy didn't know Gary's true identity at that point.]
Me: Hee hee hee!
Me: Golden Boy!  [needs to be said like Amy did that season.]
Me: So people voted out before treemail didn't really play?
Her: Not until a third person joins them at Redemption Island.
Me: I was thinking Palau again [where the aforementioned Wanda and Jonathan exited before gameplay really began].
Her: Something like that.
Me: Aras don't need no stinking help.  [Yes he does, it turns out.]
Me: Did Gervase ever learn how to swim???
Her: Apparently not.
Me: He can't even swim!  (But can win a paddling challenge.)  [Referencing a favorite Kelly comment from Borneo.]
Her: Lol
Me: Gervase was right about the puzzle.
Her: What did he say?
Me: He said the challenge was all about the puzzle portion.
Her: Of course it was.
Me: He's on the ball.
Me: Or on target, as it were.  [Referencing his and Colleen's self-imposed status in later Borneo tribal councils when they realized how the game was going to be played.]
Me: Poor naive loved ones.
Me: As we say in Boston, see ya later.  [Referencing, of course, Boston Rob.]
Her: The guys are just thinking of themselves...
Me: Nooo.
Me: (Yes.)
Her: The thing is I don't think Gervase will care.  [His niece Marissa was voted out.]
Me: Bye Marissa.
Me: There's no great reason for him.  He's actually playing the game this time.
Me: Plus he's a chauvinist pig.
Me: Moo.
Her: I don't think they are all that close.

9/25

Me: Yes, rice for Survivor night.  [Because rice is such a classic staple of the show!]
Her: Breakfast, lunch, and dinner!  Don't forget about them.  [Referencing the chickens from Borneo.]
Me: Who counted these chickens?!?  [Referencing Greg's famous statement.]
Me: Survivor!
Her: Commercial...
Me: Well, now.
Me: You haven't lived until you've watched Survivor with commentary by Mom...
Her: I can only imagine...and not the song!  [Referencing MercyMe song.]
Me: Tinker toy challenge!
Her: Sure is.
Me: Sorry, didn't get a good look.
Me: But fun!
Her: Bye Rupert!  [Gone from RI. and thus game.]
Me: By Jeff [Probst]'s own admission he now interprets Rupert's decision poorly indeed.  [Jeff had stated that success of his decision to swap with Laura hinged on whether or not he'd make it on RI.]
Her: Are you following Twitter?
Me: No, the EW interview from last week.
Her: Oh.
Me: Colton is only interested in chatting if it's about himself.
Her: He's an idiot.
Me: Indeed.  Tina's not ready for this trauma.  [Or perhaps very ready.]
Her: Is anyone?  He needs to go.
Me: Soon.  And be voted out this time.  [Not likely.]
Her: Yes please.
Me: Impromptu vote please.
Her: Like yesterday.
Me: As in don't cast him again.
Me: Or have him play against Russell.  ]Two peas in the Wrong Type of Villain pod.]
Her: Aras is a dork.  [She never accepted how awesome he is.]
Me: He's awesome.  We've covered this.  Repeatedly!
Me: Wouldn't you love to be in one of those barrels?
Her: Dizzy.
Me: Gervase!  [Referencing that he helps his team win a challenge again.]
Her: That means at least another week of Colton...Grrr
Me: The loved ones have no idea that they're all pulling a Jeff Kent [from Philippines].
Her: They aren't playing smart.
Me: Nope.
Me: Rachel came with who?
Me: Tyson?
Her: Tyson...Oye, that's partly why they targeted her in hopes he will switch with her.
Me: I guess we'll see.  [He doesn't.]
Me: Colton.  Oye.  [In reference to the previews.]
Her: I hope he quits so we don't have to see him anymore.
Me: At least no convoluted medical excuse this time [in reference to convoluted medical excuse from One World].

10/2

Her: Colton quit again!!!  Yay!
Me: Ding dong the witch is dead!
Her: Jeff [Probst] regrets bringing him back.
Me: Of course.  Someone who never had a snowball's chance of winning.  Either time.

10/9

Me: Anything interesting on Survivor?
Her: Ding dong, Culpepper to Redemption!!!  I think Candice and John can take him.
Me: Candice is certainly doing well at RI.  Culpepper can probably call it a game.

10/16

Me: Well, put Survivor on but for some reason people want to watch baseball instead...[I'd recently started a new job, and this was in reference to the breakroom TV, and the fact that the Red Sox were in playing postseason.  I live in Maine.  It's mandatory to support Boston.]
Her: That's because the Red Sox are playing...[They won the World Series, by the way.]
Me: Oh!
Me: Anything good on Survivor?
Her: Next week is going to be a tribal switch-up.  Returning players lost this week.
Me: Who did they send packing?
Her: Laura M.
Her: Candice lost the duel.
Me: Rupert's wife?
Her: No, other Laura [returning player from Samoa].
Me: Then I have no idea.  No big deal.  [Pretty much.]
Her: Really good with puzzles.  Aras masterminded it to have her at Redemptionto hopefully beat Brad.
Me: Well that sounds good.

10/23

Her: I'm guess you aren't watching Survivor...[because of the Red Sox]
Me: Anything good on Survivor tonight?
Her: Bye Brad!!! And Kat is now on Redemption Island.
Me: So long, latest would-be master strategist!
Her: Yeah, now his wife is picking up that portion...
Me: [S]he was one of the One World bimbos, right?
Her: Yup.

10/30

[Sox win World Series]
Me: Anything good shake on Survivor?
Her: No surproses, Kat is gone and they merge next week.
Me: But they hardly know each other!
Her: Whoever wins the duel next week reenters the game.  But Redemption Island isn't going away.
Me: Not until just about the end.  Which you love.

11/6

Me: Operation: Breakroom Survivor initiated.
Me: So long, Mr. Candice [John].
Me: So long, Mrs. Rupert [Laura].
Her: I did see John fight to stay on pole and Laura hover over the ground.
Me: Tom and Ian this challenge was not [once again referencing Palau].
Her: None of them could hang with Tom and Ian.
Me: Not even with Katie!  [Who was also in the referenced challenge.]
Her: True enough.
Me: Although they could bet Janu...[who did not share the same kind of fortitude earlier in Palau]
Her: Yes.
Me: Tyson found the Hidden Immunity Idol!
Her: I saw that.
Me: It took these guys forever to find it!  But I think they're a different kind of player.  More cerebral as a whole.
Her: They kept burning the clues.
Me: Not Aras!!! [Voted out.]
Her: Overconfident much!!! [Still jealous of his awesomeness.]
Her: Bye Aras!
Me: But it's all good.  I'm comfortable with this lot.
Her: Tina looks scared now.
Me: It's okay.  This is the recriminations phase.
Her: How does she figure they lost 5 votes?
Me: The people they betrayed voting him out.
Her: That's only 4 people.
Me: Including Aras?  Because he's still in play.  Should do well on RI.
Her: The 2 brothers [Aras and Vytas] and Tina/Katie [mother/daughter].
Me: And Gervase?
Her: He didn't vote with them.
Me: Well, hopefully she knows what she's talking about.  This is where things get interesting anyway.

11/13

Her: Are you watching Survivor tonight?
Me: That's the plan.
Me: Survivor!
Me: They can't do a loved ones episode this season!!!
Her: He ate them off the ground...Yuck.  [The only way to make the Disgusting Foods Challenge any worse.]
Me: Yum!
Me: One area where Gervase has improved!  [He famously and quickly crapped out in Borneo.]
Her: Yes, the one area.
Me: Has he been practicing???  With hot buttered popcorn?
Me: But he stumbles.  [Back to Borneo mode.]
Her: But it was funny to watch.  [Indeed.]
Me: Poor Gervase.
Her: I would suck at a "food" challenge.
Me: Even yummy delicious baluts [another Palau reference, because we're full of them]?
Her: Partially formed birds, I think not.
Me: Bones and all
Me: Vytas should not talk so much.
Her: He's just stirring the pot.
Me: Gervase is playing the game in a big way.  Also, mooo.
Her: He's no sitting duck this go-around.
Me: Tina?  Monica?
Me: Tina.  [It was a double elimination week, at least at tribal council.]
Her: Who keeps voting for Tyson?
Me: ...Jeff, she doesn't have a chance.  Aras prevails!  [In reference to Tina's chances at RI in Jeff Probst's estimates.]
Her: Sure.
Me: Because he is awesome.

The game continues!