Survivor: Cook Islands

originally aired 9/14/2006-12/17/2006

The order in which players left the game, and the impact they left behind:

• Sekou (Manihiki) [...]
• Billy (Aitukaki) Would-be lothario.  Completely clueless.
• Cecilia (Aitutaki) [...]
• J.P. (Aitutaki) [...]
• Stephannie (Manihiki) [...]
• "Cao Boi" (Puka Puka) The outcast who is perfectly at peace with himself.  Completely outrageous and completely awesome.
• Cristina (Aitutaki) Wrong season for this whole tribe (except one)
• Jessica (Rarotonga) Wrong tribe.
• Brad (Puka Puka) Survived Cao Boi's healing techniques, but not the rest of the tribe.
• Rebecca (Manihiki) Victim of another hapless tribe.
• Jenny (Puka Puka) Last expendable member of the tribe.
• Nate (Manihiki) Another tribemate down.
• Candace (Rarotonga) Tried to make a big move.  Didn't work.
• Jonathan (Rarotonga) Same as above.  Infinitely more memorable.
• Parvati (Raratonga) Another infinitely memorable player.  This season's Survivor sweetheart, though not so innocent.
• Adam (Raratonga) On the wrong side of the numbers.
• Sundra (Manihiki) On the wrong side of the numbers.
• Becky (Puka Puka) She wasn't Yul.
• Ozzy (Aitutaki) One of the most competitive players ever.  Got plenty more chances to compete.
• Yul (Puka Puka) A deserving winner who knew exactly how to play.

Survivor: Panama - Exile Island

originally aired 2/2/2006-5/14/2006

The order in which players left the game, and the impact they left behind:

• Tina (Casaya) Went before her time.
• Melinda (Casaya) Worth voting out.
• Misty (Bayoneta) [...]
• Ruth-Marie (Casaya) On the wrong side of the numbers.
• Bobby (Viveros) On the wrong side of the numbers.
• Dan (La Mina) On the wrong side of the numbers.  Gave surviving ally Terry a tough time with his loss.
• Nick (Viveros) On the wrong side of the numbers.
• Austin (Viveros) On the wrong side of the numbers.
• Sally (Bayoneta) This season's Survivor sweetheart.
• Bruce (La Mina) Unorthodox player in search of allies.
• Courtney (Bayoneta) One of several unstable players this season.
• Shane (La Mina) The most unstable but also most entertaining player this season.  Should not have quit smoking immediately prior to playing.
• Cirie (Casaya) The so-called "people's player" equates her own laziness with the typical viewer.  I hope not.
• Terry (La Mina) The less effective version of Palau's Tom.
• Danielle (Bayoneta) Deserved to lose.
• Aras (Viveros) Some people might find his new age ideas to be pretty nutty, but one way or another, he knew what he was doing.  Deserved to win.

Survivor: Guatemala

originally aired 9/15/2005-12/11/2005

The order in which players left the game, and the impact they left behind:

• Jim (Nakum) Old guy who barely survived.
• Morgan (Yaxha) [...]
• Brianna (Yaxha) [...]
• Brooke (Nakum) [...]
• Blake (Nakum) [...]
• Margaret (Nakum) Tried to be a nurse in Survivor.
• Brian (Yaxha) Outsmarted.
• Amy (Yaxha) Easily one of the best personalities of the game.  Not a fan of Gary.
• Brandon (Nakum) [...]
• Bobby Jon (Nakum) Second chance same as the first.
• Jamie (Yaxha) Maybe he really was going crazy.  But I guess that can happen in a game where you never know if you can trust your own allies.
• Gary (Yaxha) The first secret celebrity of Survivor.
• Judd (Nakum) Big mouth.  Didn't help him in the game.
• Cindy (Nakum) Ended up on the wrong side of the numbers.
• Lydia (Yaxha) Ended up on the wrong side of the numbers.
• Rafe (Yaxha) Ended up on the wrong side of the numbers.
• Stephenie (Yaxha) Objectively she totally deserved to win, and not just because of how she survived her last season.  
• Danni (Nakum) The first winner to win because the jury didn't want to vote for the finalist who deserved their votes.  Still, one of the more deserving default winners.

Survivor: Palau

originally aired 2/17/2005-5/15/2005

The order in which players left the game, and the impact they left behind:

• Jonathan (no tribe) Jumped out of the boat.  Was not a hot chick.
• Wanda (no tribe) Sang.  A lot.  Endearing maybe as a viewer.  Not as a player.
• Jolanda (Ulong) Foolishly believed that she was better than she was.  Perfect as a would-be leader of Ulong...
• Ashlee (Ulong) She looked weak.
• Jeff (Ulong) He rolled his ankle on a coconut.
• Kim (Ulong) She aligned herself with Jeff.
• Willard (Koror) He was old.
• Angie (Ulong) She was an actual competitor.
• James (Ulong) He was an idiot.  Though an entertaining one.
• Ibrehem (Ulong) He was useless.
• Bobby Jon (Ulong) He worked harder than he thought.
• Coby (Koror) He wasn't Tom.
• Janu (Koror) She lay down her torch.  Eventually.
• Stephenie (Ulong) She outlasted her own tribe.  Is it worth reiterating how pathetic Ulong was?  And not just in comparison to Koror?  An atypically competitive Survivor sweetheart.
• Gregg (Koror) Was not Tom.
• Caryn (Koror) She was not Katie.
• Jenn (Koror) She was the Koror version of this season's Survivor sweetheart. (R.I.P.)
• Ian (Koror) Was as close to being Tom as Tom was.  But had to grow up a little.
• Katie (Koror) Made a game effort of trying to steal the win from Tom.
• Tom (Koror) The most deserving winner to ever play Survivor.  Caught a shark.  Was a funny drunk.  Talked Ian out of the final challenge, the most epic final immunity challenge ever. 

Survivor: Vanuatu

originally aired /16/2004-12/12/2004

The order in which players left the game, and the impact they left behind:

• Brook (Lopevi) It's always tough being male in a season split by sexes.
• Dolly (Yasur) Then again, this season it wasn't easy being female, either.
• John (Lopevi) [...]
• Mia (Yasur) [...]
• Brady (Lopevi) [...]
• Travis (Lopevi) "Bubba" was just on the wrong side of numbers, especially as tribal swaps go.
• Lisa (Yasur) Ended up on the wrong side of numbers.
• John (Lopevi) Wrong side of the numbers.
• Rory (Lopevi) Victim of a tribe swap.
• Lea (Lopevi) "Sarge" was a victim of the numbers.
• Chad (Lopevi) The game's first amputee proved that he was game.  Except he was on the wrong side of the numbers.
• Leann (Yasur) On the wrong side of the numbers.
• Ami (Yasur) On the wrong side of the numbers.
• Julie (Yasur) Jeff's Survivor sweetheart, for a while.
• Eliza (Yasur) Of the famed facial expressions.
• Scout (Yasur) Crazy old lady.
• Twila (Yasur) Sabotaged everything around her, including herself.
• Chris (Lopevi) Last male standing survived the carnage and won the game.

Survivor: All-Stars

originally aired 2/1/2004-5/9/2004

The order in which players left the game, and the impact they left behind:

• Tina (Saboga; Australian Outback) The winner who went out first.
• Rudy (Saboga; Borneo) The crotchety old man who went home early.
• Jenna (Mogo Mogo; Amazon) The winner who took herself out of the game.
• Rob (Chapera; Amazon) The genius who can't figure this game out.
• Richard (Mogo Mogo; Borneo) The winner who surrendered to his own ego.
• Susan (Chapera; Borneo) The chick who let her emotions get the best of her.
• Colby (Mogo Mogo; Australian Outback) The stud lets the game slip away from him.
• Ethan (Saboga; Africa) The winner sabotaged by his own allies.
• Jerri (Saboga; Australian Outback) The vixen no one will allow to make it far.
• Lex (Mogo Mogo; Africa) The rocker who deludes himself.
• Kathy (Mogo Mogo; Marquesas) The chick on the wrong side of the numbers.
• Alicia (Chapera; Australian Outback) The brawn with no strength of numbers.
• Shii Ann (Mogo Mogo; Thailand) The chick who outstrategizes herself.
• Tom (Chapera; Africa) The farm boy who was put out to pasture.
• Rupert (Saboga; Pearl Islands) The pirate who couldn't find anyone to trust.
• Jenna (Saboga; Borneo) The chick who thought she had power.
• Rob (Chapera; Marquesas) The dude from Boston with all the power.
• Amber (Chapera;Australian Outback) The chick who aligned herself from the dude from Boston.

Survivor: Pearl Islands

originally aired 9/18/2003-12/14/2003

The order in which players left the game, and the impact they left behind:

• Nicole (Morgan) Expendable in a season of pirates.
• Ryan S. (Morgan) Played in a season of pirates.
• Lilian (Morgan) This is where she should have stayed, rather than her grossly emotional nature making to the final thanks to the Outcast tribe.
• Burton (Drake) An alpha male playing Survivor gets voted out somehow.
• Michelle (Drake) On the wrong side of numbers.
• Trish (Drake) On the wrong side of numbers.
• Shawn (Drake) On the wrong side of numbers.
• Osten (Morgan) The first player to quit.  Lesson learned: prepare a body like that a little better, because it will only betray you in the game.
• Andrew (Morgan) One of my favorites, got on the wrong side of numbers and couldn't convince anyone (Rupert) to see it any other way.
• Ryan O. (Morgan) On the wrong side of numbers.
• Rupert (Drake) Lived and died on his exuberant emotions, became one of the most popular players ever, played like a pirate, had no working strategy to win.
• Tijuana (Morgan) Wrong side of the numbers.
• Christa (Drake) Wrong side of the numbers.
• Burton (Drake) Voted out again because he still couldn't figure out how to play well with others.
• Darrah (Morgan) A patented Survivor sweetheart.
• Jon (Drake) "Jonny Fairplay" is one of the most memorable players ever, not the least for his "dead grandmother."  Remarkably still not the least likable player of the season.
• Lilian (Morgan) You wear the scout costume you stick by the scout costume. 
• Sandra (Drake) The luckiest winner in Survivor history, not just because she won this season but got to play another season exactly like it, and won that one, too. Otherwise a pretty thoroughly unremarkable player.