We're now nine weeks into the twenty-sixth season of Survivor, and I figured I'd chime in on how it's been going. In case you don't know, this is an entire "loved ones" season, in that half the cast is returning players and half various versions of their family. The most obvious example of this is Rupert and his wife Laura. Rupert became a fan favorite in his previous seasons in part because of the relationship he has with his wife, which was infectious the moment she visited him for the first time. Of course, both of them quickly left this season.
Anyway, here's what I'm going to do, which is share text messages I've exchanged with my sister, who is also a big fan of the series, during the course of the season. Let's begin:
9/18
Me: We're going to be watching Survivor.
Her: Of course you are.
Me: I was evoking [singing Wanda from] Palau. You should sing that text to yourself.
Her: Lol
Me: [referencing a comment from the show for emphasis] Aras = likable winner.
Her: Gervase is still funny.
Me: Still awesome.
Her: No cow comments please [referencing infamous Gervase/Joel incident from Borneo].
Me: Mooo.
Her: Lol
Me: Bye Rupert's wife [referencing Laura being sent immediately to Redemption Island].
Me: Redemption Island is back!
Her: I already knew that [she favors spoilers].
Me: Rupert is good [referencing his decision to opt for the swap with his wife so he goes to RI instead of her].
Me: You're a spoily spoiler.
Her: Go Candice! Rupert's had a lot of chances already. [Candice is the other player sent immediately to RI.]
Me: And gotten a million already [via audience fan favorite award].
Her: I don't understand why the vets didn't go after Tina or Rupert...
Me: Of course, Candice has played a few times too, and the reason Rupert exited Heroes vs. Villains.
Me: Besides Rupert himself.
Me: They went after an actual threat [in the decision to send Candice to RI; later developments prove Tina to be a major threat, however].
Her: She could have really helped them in challenges.
Me: Well, that's not how they think.
Me: It's on like hot buttered popcorn at the break of dawn! [Referencing a favorite Gervase quote from Borneo.]
Her: Oye
Me: Oye!
Her: Maybe he took too many hits in the NFL...[referencing Brad Culpepper, Monica's husband and loved one]
Me: Probably.
Her: Not good game play.
Me: Professional athletes don't do well in this game.
Her: Not true, Gary did well [referencing Gary Hogeboom from Guatamala].
Me: They have to be high school coaches [referencing, of course, "Coach" Ben Wade].
Me: Gary? He was just a regular guy!
Her: I'm going to hunt you down! [Referencing a favorite quote from Amy that season.]
Me: Easy to hunt down! [Not really, because Amy didn't know Gary's true identity at that point.]
Me: Hee hee hee!
Me: Golden Boy! [needs to be said like Amy did that season.]
Me: So people voted out before treemail didn't really play?
Her: Not until a third person joins them at Redemption Island.
Me: I was thinking Palau again [where the aforementioned Wanda and Jonathan exited before gameplay really began].
Her: Something like that.
Me: Aras don't need no stinking help. [Yes he does, it turns out.]
Me: Did Gervase ever learn how to swim???
Her: Apparently not.
Me: He can't even swim! (But can win a paddling challenge.) [Referencing a favorite Kelly comment from Borneo.]
Her: Lol
Me: Gervase was right about the puzzle.
Her: What did he say?
Me: He said the challenge was all about the puzzle portion.
Her: Of course it was.
Me: He's on the ball.
Me: Or on target, as it were. [Referencing his and Colleen's self-imposed status in later Borneo tribal councils when they realized how the game was going to be played.]
Me: Poor naive loved ones.
Me: As we say in Boston, see ya later. [Referencing, of course, Boston Rob.]
Her: The guys are just thinking of themselves...
Me: Nooo.
Me: (Yes.)
Her: The thing is I don't think Gervase will care. [His niece Marissa was voted out.]
Me: Bye Marissa.
Me: There's no great reason for him. He's actually playing the game this time.
Me: Plus he's a chauvinist pig.
Me: Moo.
Her: I don't think they are all that close.
9/25
Me: Yes, rice for Survivor night. [Because rice is such a classic staple of the show!]
Her: Breakfast, lunch, and dinner! Don't forget about them. [Referencing the chickens from Borneo.]
Me: Who counted these chickens?!? [Referencing Greg's famous statement.]
Me: Survivor!
Her: Commercial...
Me: Well, now.
Me: You haven't lived until you've watched Survivor with commentary by Mom...
Her: I can only imagine...and not the song! [Referencing MercyMe song.]
Me: Tinker toy challenge!
Her: Sure is.
Me: Sorry, didn't get a good look.
Me: But fun!
Her: Bye Rupert! [Gone from RI. and thus game.]
Me: By Jeff [Probst]'s own admission he now interprets Rupert's decision poorly indeed. [Jeff had stated that success of his decision to swap with Laura hinged on whether or not he'd make it on RI.]
Her: Are you following Twitter?
Me: No, the EW interview from last week.
Her: Oh.
Me: Colton is only interested in chatting if it's about himself.
Her: He's an idiot.
Me: Indeed. Tina's not ready for this trauma. [Or perhaps very ready.]
Her: Is anyone? He needs to go.
Me: Soon. And be voted out this time. [Not likely.]
Her: Yes please.
Me: Impromptu vote please.
Her: Like yesterday.
Me: As in don't cast him again.
Me: Or have him play against Russell. ]Two peas in the Wrong Type of Villain pod.]
Her: Aras is a dork. [She never accepted how awesome he is.]
Me: He's awesome. We've covered this. Repeatedly!
Me: Wouldn't you love to be in one of those barrels?
Her: Dizzy.
Me: Gervase! [Referencing that he helps his team win a challenge again.]
Her: That means at least another week of Colton...Grrr
Me: The loved ones have no idea that they're all pulling a Jeff Kent [from Philippines].
Her: They aren't playing smart.
Me: Nope.
Me: Rachel came with who?
Me: Tyson?
Her: Tyson...Oye, that's partly why they targeted her in hopes he will switch with her.
Me: I guess we'll see. [He doesn't.]
Me: Colton. Oye. [In reference to the previews.]
Her: I hope he quits so we don't have to see him anymore.
Me: At least no convoluted medical excuse this time [in reference to convoluted medical excuse from One World].
10/2
Her: Colton quit again!!! Yay!
Me: Ding dong the witch is dead!
Her: Jeff [Probst] regrets bringing him back.
Me: Of course. Someone who never had a snowball's chance of winning. Either time.
10/9
Me: Anything interesting on Survivor?
Her: Ding dong, Culpepper to Redemption!!! I think Candice and John can take him.
Me: Candice is certainly doing well at RI. Culpepper can probably call it a game.
10/16
Me: Well, put Survivor on but for some reason people want to watch baseball instead...[I'd recently started a new job, and this was in reference to the breakroom TV, and the fact that the Red Sox were in playing postseason. I live in Maine. It's mandatory to support Boston.]
Her: That's because the Red Sox are playing...[They won the World Series, by the way.]
Me: Oh!
Me: Anything good on Survivor?
Her: Next week is going to be a tribal switch-up. Returning players lost this week.
Me: Who did they send packing?
Her: Laura M.
Her: Candice lost the duel.
Me: Rupert's wife?
Her: No, other Laura [returning player from Samoa].
Me: Then I have no idea. No big deal. [Pretty much.]
Her: Really good with puzzles. Aras masterminded it to have her at Redemptionto hopefully beat Brad.
Me: Well that sounds good.
10/23
Her: I'm guess you aren't watching Survivor...[because of the Red Sox]
Me: Anything good on Survivor tonight?
Her: Bye Brad!!! And Kat is now on Redemption Island.
Me: So long, latest would-be master strategist!
Her: Yeah, now his wife is picking up that portion...
Me: [S]he was one of the One World bimbos, right?
Her: Yup.
10/30
[Sox win World Series]
Me: Anything good shake on Survivor?
Her: No surproses, Kat is gone and they merge next week.
Me: But they hardly know each other!
Her: Whoever wins the duel next week reenters the game. But Redemption Island isn't going away.
Me: Not until just about the end. Which you love.
11/6
Me: Operation: Breakroom Survivor initiated.
Me: So long, Mr. Candice [John].
Me: So long, Mrs. Rupert [Laura].
Her: I did see John fight to stay on pole and Laura hover over the ground.
Me: Tom and Ian this challenge was not [once again referencing Palau].
Her: None of them could hang with Tom and Ian.
Me: Not even with Katie! [Who was also in the referenced challenge.]
Her: True enough.
Me: Although they could bet Janu...[who did not share the same kind of fortitude earlier in Palau]
Her: Yes.
Me: Tyson found the Hidden Immunity Idol!
Her: I saw that.
Me: It took these guys forever to find it! But I think they're a different kind of player. More cerebral as a whole.
Her: They kept burning the clues.
Me: Not Aras!!! [Voted out.]
Her: Overconfident much!!! [Still jealous of his awesomeness.]
Her: Bye Aras!
Me: But it's all good. I'm comfortable with this lot.
Her: Tina looks scared now.
Me: It's okay. This is the recriminations phase.
Her: How does she figure they lost 5 votes?
Me: The people they betrayed voting him out.
Her: That's only 4 people.
Me: Including Aras? Because he's still in play. Should do well on RI.
Her: The 2 brothers [Aras and Vytas] and Tina/Katie [mother/daughter].
Me: And Gervase?
Her: He didn't vote with them.
Me: Well, hopefully she knows what she's talking about. This is where things get interesting anyway.
11/13
Her: Are you watching Survivor tonight?
Me: That's the plan.
Me: Survivor!
Me: They can't do a loved ones episode this season!!!
Her: He ate them off the ground...Yuck. [The only way to make the Disgusting Foods Challenge any worse.]
Me: Yum!
Me: One area where Gervase has improved! [He famously and quickly crapped out in Borneo.]
Her: Yes, the one area.
Me: Has he been practicing??? With hot buttered popcorn?
Me: But he stumbles. [Back to Borneo mode.]
Her: But it was funny to watch. [Indeed.]
Me: Poor Gervase.
Her: I would suck at a "food" challenge.
Me: Even yummy delicious baluts [another Palau reference, because we're full of them]?
Her: Partially formed birds, I think not.
Me: Bones and all
Me: Vytas should not talk so much.
Her: He's just stirring the pot.
Me: Gervase is playing the game in a big way. Also, mooo.
Her: He's no sitting duck this go-around.
Me: Tina? Monica?
Me: Tina. [It was a double elimination week, at least at tribal council.]
Her: Who keeps voting for Tyson?
Me: ...Jeff, she doesn't have a chance. Aras prevails! [In reference to Tina's chances at RI in Jeff Probst's estimates.]
Her: Sure.
Me: Because he is awesome.
The game continues!
